Rachel, I feel I’m left out of things
The writer, who's older, is not invited to after-work get-togethers
June 22, 2012
To tell you the truth, I feel a bit isolated at work. I am older than my boss by 20 years, and many of my co-workers are the age of my youngest daughter. Come the end of the day, the young people invariably meet up for drinks, sometimes in large groups, and I'm never invited. A part of me says fine, I don't really drink and I would rather be at home with my family. But another part of me worries that I'm missing out on something and that at some point it could hurt my career, or what remains of it. I am happy here, and I want to stay here—and employed. Am I worrying about nothing? Or should I be worried? Sign me More Senior and Anxious
I would not worry, were I in your boots. I'd focus on my work, doing the best job I could, and go home at the end of the day feeling good about what I had accomplished.
There are several good reasons why you are probably not being invited. For one, you have a family, and a lot of places young people go after work are places to meet other singles.
When you were 26, would you have invited someone in their 50s to go with you to a singles bar? Probably not.
Consider also that if you did go out, wouldn't you find yourself bored with a lot of the talk? Those young people are probably talking about things you have no interest in. Or if the talk relates to work, they're talking about the sort of career issues you've long ago resolved.
Simply put, a lot of what gets talked about in those post-work settings is pretty ho-hum.
More important, though, you have to consider your value to the agency and how well you get along with your boss and others during office hours. That's the real measure of your standing.
Are you getting good performance reviews? Are you seeing pay raises? Are you put in charge of projects?
True, many great friendships are created over drinks, but at the end of the day what really matters is the quality of one's work. Friendships built over drinks are often just that. They are seldom the building blocks of great careers.
Fox fills out next season with a pair of pickups
Time Inc. to bidders: No breaking up the company
Is ‘Missing Richard Simmons’ the next ‘Serial’?
NBC wins eighth straight Tuesday with ‘This Is Us’
How the Daytona 500 will play out on social media
TV programming blog: All the cancellations and renewals
Study: Millennial men are cutting the cord in droves
MLB may soon play ball in a new place: Facebook
Google: We’re going for MRC accreditation too
The 2017 Academy Awards by the numbers
Hispanic media upbeat, even in the face of roundups
For ‘Speechless,’ a shameless plug for the Oscars
After huge stink, Breitbart News editor takes a powder
- Ian Loon becomes Singapore managing director at Starcom
- Global Team Blue CCO Toby Barlow exits
- Alice Ollstein becomes a reporter at Talking Points Memo
- Steffen Svartberg Kristiansen becomes head of Nordic operations at Tapad
- Ezekiel Emanuel becomes a contributor at Fox News Channel
- Alex Meraz joins WGN America's 'Scalped'
- Tim Robbins joins the cast of HBO's Alan Ball drama
- Fox News Channel personality Brenda Buttner dies at 55
- Film critic Richard Schickel dies at age 84
This week’s top-rated movies, songs and books
This week’s daypart ratings
This week’s broadcast ratings
This week’s cable ratings
This month’s digital traffic data: December 2016
Opening for a media planner at a top OOH agency
Orlando agency looking for a media planner/buyer
Freelance media planner/buyer available
Junior media planner/buyer position in Minneapolis-St. Paul
Media sales coordinator opening in New York