It’s almost impossible to figure out how a show as
unfunny as CBS’s new “Listen Up,” premiering tonight at 8:30 p.m., grew out
of fertilizer as funny as ESPN host Tony Kornheiser’s Washington Post Style columns.
The columns brim with humor, humility and a
surprisingly keen understanding of family dynamics. None of that carries into the sitcom,
least of all the humor.
Like Kornheiser, fictional Tony writes a weekly
lifestyle column and co-hosts an irreverent daily sports TV talk show, which means he and
his co-host talk really loud. Tony is also a somewhat clueless father to two teenagers.
He angers daughter Megan by making fun of her in
his first lifestyle column, a slight that he is both too dense to realize and too callous
to apologize for. This sets up what we can only imagine will be a season of Tony offending
his family in print and paying for it in person.
The show miscasts the ever-whiny Jason
Alexander as the Kornheiser character (called Tony Kleinman in this version), the
second-biggest blunder in the show.
The first is presuming that this version of Tony
is for one second likeable. He sneers at his co-host, condescends to his wife and kids,
and thinks the world should revolve around him because he “feels things more
deeply” than most people.
This is also a typical CBS comedy in which you wonder how the dumpy guy ended
up with such an attractive woman (see also: “Still Standing,” “King of
Queens”) and why she puts up with the always-wrong man’s shortcomings (see:
“Everybody Loves Raymond”).
This show makes less sense than those other
sometimes amusing shows, though.
When Tony runs off a potential donor for wife Dana’s zoo, Dana lets this
go without much comment. Instead she tries to make more of an effort to bond with her
husband by watching his stupid TV show, explaining to her daughter, “What am I
supposed to do, walk around mad at him all the time?”
No, but by all means consider therapy or divorce.
The beauty of Kornheiser’s columns is that
they’re totally self-aware. The Tony in “Listen Up” is not aware of
anything but himself. And that’s not the kind of guy you want to spend three minutes
with, let alone 30. Quality of show (on a scale of 10): 3
The writers clearly don’t understand what
makes Kornheiser funny. It’s not making over-the-top comments. It’s making those
comments with an understanding of what’s behind them. Kornheiser’s columns about
his late father offered insight and understanding of his dad’s plight. Kleinman is
mainly excited that Megan actually read his column when she blows up at him.
The real Kornheiser would, mercifully, never do a
song-and-dance number about the low-scoring game of soccer. The fictional Tony does, to
painful effect.
The show's writers never met an obvious joke they
didn’t like. Sample: At Megan’s soccer game, Tony shouts at a girl who bumped
Megan, “You’re telling me that’s a girl? How about a chromosome test?”
As you may have guessed, he is standing right
next to the girl’s father. Ha, ha.
Alexander is best taken in small doses, such as
the supporting player he portrayed on “Seinfeld.” He’s not capable of
subtle acting, and he’s too one-dimensional to carry this show. That’s
emphasized by the milquetoast quality of the rest of the cast.
Only “Cosby Show” veteran Malcolm-Jamal
Warner (Bernie) shows a hint of personality, and, as Tony’s TV co-host, he’s
only on the air enough to lob a few fat/bald jokes. The thing we appreciate about Bernie
is that he seems to understand, unlike everyone else on the show, that there's far less to
Tony than one might first think. Maybe he should give Dana a call.
Positioning (on a scale of 10): 8
If the bland “Yes, Dear” could
thrive in this protected 8:30 p.m. Monday spot for years, then “Listen Up” could
make it to the end of the season. It enters the schedule at a good time, while
“Everybody Loves Raymond” is still there to protect it at 9 p.m. and NBC’s
competing “Fear Factor” looks weaker in its return.
However, if “Listen” fumbles too much of
lead-in “Standing’s” audience, CBS has a half-season of “Yes,
Dear” waiting in the wings. “Listen” will get a longer chance to draw an
audience than most rookie sitcoms, but CBS will also be expecting it to deliver a bigger
audience.
And flop stench is even more pungent when a show
has high expectations.
Cache, or the “Arrested Development” factor (on a scale
of 10): 3
Six years after “Seinfeld,” Alexander
remains a well-known name, but the ABC bomb “Bob Patterson” erased most of what
was left of his prestige factor. The sports fans who watch Kornheiser’s “Pardon
the Interruption” weekdays on ESPN will surely know this show is on, but they’ll
tune out once they realize it’s a family show, not a sports one.
Reviewers have called the show bland and unfunny,
both accurate descriptions.
Overall (on a scale of 30): 14.
The “Seinfeld” curse lives, but this
terrible show will not.
Read past fall show reviews:
WB's
"Blue Collar TV"
NBC's
"Father of the Pride"
NBC's
"Hawaii"
NBC's
"Joey"
NBC's
"Medical Investigation"
WB's
"Jack & Bobby"
ABC's
"The Benefactor"
NBC's
"LAX"
ABC's
"Lost"
The Media Life Meter
Rating fall’s new shows |
| |
“Listen
Up” (CBS) |
Avg. for all
2004-’05 shows |
| Quality
of show (on a scale of 10) – Grading the writing, acting, premise and creativity of
the show. Is it any good? |
3 |
5 |
| Positioning
(on a scale of 10) – Does the show have a tough time slot or a compatible lead-in? Is
the subject matter appropriate to the network on which it airs? |
8 |
4.9 |
| Cache,
or the “Arrested Development” factor (on a scale of 10) – Examining the
reviews, the star power and the prestige the network gets for the project.
“Arrested,” for example, has high cache for being well reviewed and intelligent,
even though its ratings aren’t great. |
3 |
4.4 |
| TOTAL |
14 |
14.3 |
Probability of Survival |
|
| 30-27 |
Odds are this show will make it to next season. |
| 26-22 |
Odds are this show will make it through this season. |
| 21-15 |
Show may not survive the season. |
| 15-9 |
Show will be canceled sometime this season. |
| 8 or
lower |
Catch it while you can – this show may not
make it to four episodes. |
| Source:
Media Life |
|
