Dear Rachel,
I am beside myself I am so angry. Is it just me? I am surrounded by a bunch of 24-year-olds who spend much of their time whining. They're unhappy about the long hours working in media, they don't make enough money, they don't like their supervisor (who happens to be me, I should add). They whine so much they don't get half the work done they should. Part of me thinks I'm just getting older and less patient, but I sometimes I wonder if it's today's parents and their obsessive doting on their kids that's turned out a generation of snivelers. Any advice ?--Older and getting crankier by the day

Dear Older,
We could debate endlessly the cause of the very real problem you point out. I personally feel today's kids are no worse than those of past decades, despite all that's written about them and their need for pampering.

I also note, and I'm sure you'll agree, that most young media people do work hard and don't complain. It's just that the few complain so loudly that it sounds like a full chorus.

The problem so often is that these complainers come from homes where complaining was tolerated, if not encouraged--the family that whines together stays together.

One might expect college to take some of it out of them but that's not what college is about, and if anything it was probably accepted behavior in the way drinking tons of beer and staying up all hours was and is accepted.

The upshot is that when these whiners get to their first job they really have no sense of how to behave in a workplace environment. And making it worse, most media departments are far too busy getting the work out to train these people in the basics of adulthood.

Too often, rather than taking a whiner aside for a good talking to, hardworking media people will step in and pick up the extra load. That's in fact one of the findings in a story in today's Media Life based on a survey of media planners and buyers posted last week about workplace issues.

So the whining goes on and on.

What should you do?

Here's my advice: Refuse to put up with it. Make it very clear that you will not tolerate it on your team, and that if it keeps up you will take whatever action you need to put an end to, from handing out bad performance reviews to getting the person fired.

One problem with whiners, I've found, is that they operate on the assumption that you as their supervisor are seeking out their approval. (That's where the bad parenting comes in.)

You need to persuade them by your actions that you have no interest in their approval and that what matters is whether you approve of them and their work.

That's not always an easy lesson to drive home. Whiners are typically not good listeners. But they'll get the message with that first bad performance review or the first real chewing out they receive for bungling a particular work assignment.

The important thing--and this is true in all areas of management--is to make very clear what your workplace values are to enforce them with consistency and without favoritism.

If you can do that, you will have yourself a crackerjack team, as well as the respect and appreciation of those on the team who do carry their weight without complaining.

Will you turn these whiners around overnight? No, it's going take time and hard work, but then that's what real leadership is about.