Dear Rachel,
I have a problem. My boss has sent me a friend request on Facebook. I know she's already friends with a few people in the office. The thing is, I don't know if I should friend her. We get along fine, but I don't particularly want her to see my status updates, some of which are inappropriate for work, or know the fact that I stay logged on to the site all day, even during work. At the same time, I don't want to offend her by rejecting her request. So far I've just been pretending I haven't seen it, but it's already been a few weeks, and I'm starting to feel uncomfortable. What should I do?-- Facebook Addict

Dear Addict,
I think you should be truthful with her and explain that as much as you respect her as a boss and like her as a person, you believe it's important to keep your personal life separate from your office life and that friending her would cross that line.

You won't feel particularly comfortable about doing it, but if you handle it well, you can maintain good relations and get the matter behind you.

You don't have much choice, really.

If you don't address the issue, she might let it drop but more likely she would persist, and at some point you could find yourself in a far more uncomfortable situation.

She’ll be offended on two fronts. You’ve not friended her and you’ve been rude in not even acknowledging her request.

I think the other issue you raise is what you are putting up on your page.

Sites like Facebook invite users to open themselves up to their friends, and they are a wonderful way to stay in touch with people without having to pick up the telephone.

But we all know the downsides. What you post can find its way into the wrong places, leading to all sorts of embarrassment. The best advice--and I am hardly original in saying this--is to never post anything you wouldn't want your mother to see.

So leave off all references to your steamy dates, and leave off all snide comments about people you work with, or know socially.

As for your Facebook addiction, I can offer little help there. I have the same addiction, and I rationalize it this way: There are worse things to get hooked on.

In time there may be a 12-step program for us, but until then I'll just have to learn to control my addictive behavior.